“When in Rome” is often an excuse to do something because you're there and you can – well, in this case, “When in Florida." I recently found myself in Miami with some time to spare and thought to myself, “Since I’m here, why not drive down to Key West?” With Driving Line searching for The Ultimate Road Trip this month, I set out to see if a drive down to the Florida Keys really was a road trip to paradise. Aside from being the subject of 80’s soft rock songs, all I knew of the Florida Keys was Key Lime Pie and its short distance to Cuba. A quick glance in Google Maps told me that Key West was a 150 mile drive from Miami. I hopped in my exotic Chevy Cruze rental and left the art deco hotels and bikini clad streets of Miami’s South Beach, glamorized by rapper and Florida native, Rick Ro$$, for the slow life in paradise of the Keys as described by the Beach Boys in “Kokomo”. After fighting past the traffic of Miami, I began to see a little more of paradise with every mile marker that passed. There are 42 bridges that connect the Florida Keys, a chain of islands, together like a pearl necklace. The longest of which (Seven Mile Bridge) suspends you 65 feet over the water for 7 miles. Traffic permitting, it’s the kind of drive you can set your car on cruise control and enjoy the view. There are no sharp turns or exits if you’re headed to Key West – stay on the 1 and follow the mile markers all the way down to zero. It was difficult to focus on the road ahead with post card views of the Atlantic Ocean to my left and the Gulf of Mexico to my right; I was surrounded by clear blue water as far as the eye could see. Every look outside the window begs you to pull over and stop at the beach. I finally succumbed and pulled over at Bahia Honda State Park. While it has no relation to the Honda Motor Company, the clear blue waters and white sand beach were worth stopping for. Seeing the names of each island between bridges was part of the fun of the drive. Each island had a "Key" at the end of its name; Sugarloaf Key, Ramrod Key, Knockemdown Key, No Name Key and Fat Deer Key. Signs such as crocodile crossing and hurricane evacuation route were distinctly Florida. Coincidentally, I also saw an annual death toll sign warning passers-by. I thought this odd, but after doing some research found that the ratio of cars to numbers of deaths make this road one of the most dangerous in the US. Key West might not claim such road side attractions as “The World’s Largest Thermometer” and kids won’t be begging to stop and run though “The World’s Largest Corn Maze,” but it does have beaches, remnants of decaying bridge and the famous Key Largo. Although I didn't stop in Key Largo, I did not see anything worth singing about. You may want to stop to take a show in at Theater of The Sea or to do a selfie with this giant lobster. At the end of the straight, two lane stretch, I reached a fork in the road and a sign welcoming me to Paradise, USA. Continuing down the street, past the Ernest Hemingway Home, and the lack-luster "Mile 0" sign (I thought it deserved more!)... ...I found this large buoy marking the Southernmost Point in the United States. I was 90 miles from Cuba - making Key West closer to Cuba than it is to Miami. While the streets of Key West are typically filled with scooters, bicycles and tour buses, it isn’t completely void of car culture - this lifted F150 looks almost tall enough to drive to Cuba in. Eventually you'll end up at Duval Street, famous for its historical architecture, bars and restaurants - such as the original Margaritaville. I parked just in time to catch the sun coming down - surprised by Mallory Square's nightly "Sunset Celebration" along the boardwalk. Not only do you get a unique and amazing drive there, but you arrive at a destination with a total island vibe - from the weather to the food and sounds on the street. Perfect conditions for a drink and some key lime pie. The music, dining, and drinks, all beneath a star-filled sky, help to invoke a dream-like state that makes you wonder if you really did take the road to Paradise. But the next morning, the world whisks you back to reality. If the headache from last night's drinks and key lime pie isn't enough to know, they put up a sign to tell you, “Leaving Key Largo Back to Reality.” While driving to Key West in a rental car was never on my bucket list, I found it a perfect tropical escape that was only a road trip away. Next time you’re in South Florida, you might as well drive down to paradise...or better yet, rent an exotic car to do it in and make the trip even closer to heaven.
